I took many steps forward and now I´m taking two steps back. PM is giving me signals. A little temperature, muscle pain and fatigue. Actually I´m not suprised. Last weeks have been emotionally very heavy to deal with. When you are up against a narcist person, it is everything but easy. And I´m the one (once again) who is paying the price for everything. With my health. Financially as well, but I don´t care about that, if he would just let me be and live my life. But no. I have my doubts that I am actually facing two persons who both might be narcists. Not an easy or desiredably place to be in.

But I´m still hanging in here. Fighting back. Trying to get my life back. Trying to get myself back. Naturally this has a huge affect on everything else. It makes me tired. It takes my energy, which (as we all know) is limited. I sleep 10-12 hrs a night and feel like it´s not enough. I feel like I have taken my last resources in use. Every bit of strength I have left.

To make things more complicated my stomach and back is giving me a hard time. The pain is just terrible. Going to see a doctor next week. My rigth foot is also aching. There is probably a fracture. Just like the one I had in my left foot last summer. Getting a doctor to take a look at it, is difficult. The system has changed and the change is not good. Problems come when you´re not a medical emergency -case.